I’ve stubbed my TIPPING toe

Merely one week with Mark and you’d quickly acknowledge that he’s the king of tipping. It’s likely that he would tip 25% or more for dinner and tips his hair designer over 30%! Sometimes, I wish he tipped me…but then, that would be somewhat sketchy and a bit scandalous, so let’s not.
Ok, here’s my theory… I believe that your wages are something you receive for your work and a tip is something you earn above and beyond your existing income and depends upon the quality of service rendered.
Example? I’ve got plenty!
The other day, I got food from Applebee’s Carside To Go [my failsafe approach to cooking a decent dinner]. However, it wasn’t “carside” at all. I had to go in and wait at the bar, they handed me the bag, and I walked out. The same thing happens when I get food from a fast food restaurant, and I’m not expected to tip there, so I thought I was fine just writing “pick up” in the area where the tip should go. Well, according to king tip, that wasn’t acceptable.
Today, I went to get my hair done. As the stylist was putting the finishing touches and product galore on each strand of my hair, I noticed that my roots were significantly lighter than the rest of my locks – it looked like a 6 month old dye job gone bad…so, a Cathi Stegall first…instead of getting in my car and freaking out about it, I mentioned it to the stylist and am going back for a “touch up” next week. Did I tip? Yes? How much? Less than 10%.
Aren’t tips more like “bonuses” in the real world that you earn by doing something well? I’m totally not against a healthy tip…my theory necessitates that it is preceded by a job well done.


22 thoughts on “I’ve stubbed my TIPPING toe

  1. i think i’m with you on this one, although i’m known to be a crazy-generous tipper when it’s warranted. (niel calls ME the tip QUEEN!) but really, if the service isn’t good, i’m not going to make them think it was by tipping generously…

    “…a bit scandalous, so let’s not” — THAT made me laugh!

  2. Hmmm…tipping the hairstylist is a must if they do a good job, if it takes 3 hrs to do something…that takes the rest of the world 1 hr, then I would say she would get a tip, but less then I was going to give.

    Resturaunts…its depends on how darn expensive!
    I will say if you are at Denny’s, and its FREE because of a coupon, then TIP the waiter/waitress, and tip them for the cost of what your meal would have been…
    so you got it for FREE big deal, this way you are giving her a tip, its just the cost of the meal…
    ALSO, definitely tip the people who seem very discombobulated when they serve you, they might just be having a bad day.
    My friend and I put our $10 each together from our meals, and
    handed it to her as we left, it was WAFFLE HOUSE, and it was horribly busy, and her boss was on her case…
    Okay, deep breath now ang!

    I have heard you are supposed to tip other places too…but
    we aren’t apart of the Trump clan now are we…do what you can, with what you have!

    Love ya girly girl..
    [and i fell asleep at 3pm yesterday, could be from working overnight, running down the beach afraid i would lose my lunchbox in the water, and learning how to use a calculator at school….anyways, I never did go to the parents house, its now 3:35am so I am thinking today might be another day:) LOL!!!)

  3. Man if I got tipped every time I dealt with a child in crisis I would be a rich woman! Seriously though, I tip according to the service that I get. I am not high maintenance when it comes to service. Just keep the Diet Coke coming and I am happy! It has to be really bad for me to complain about it. When the service is great then I leave a great tip. That about sums up my thoughts on the issue.

  4. I probably tip more than I need to. Although it’s no longer a problem since I can’t afford to eat out anymore.

    The thing that I never felt was fair is that the cost of the meal dictates what dollar amount of what the tip is “supposed” to be.

    A waitress at a dinner works just as hard as one at an expensive restaurant. Why should one get a small tip and the other a huge tip just because the meal cost more?

  5. as a former waitress, i have some opinions on tipping…:)
    i’m not sure if the “common public” know that most waitress/waiters only make $2.13/hour. so basically, a tip isn’t just above and beyond, it’s the only thing they get. now, most waitresses i know definitely make decent enough money for what they do, but in any case, the truth is, it all comes from tips. i think it is a flawed system personally. my grandpa used to NEVER tip because he thought it was ridiculous for businesses to rely on the customers to pay for their food and pay for their service. basically, restaurants aren’t paying their servers. it is kind of jacked.
    as far as hairdressers go, i am unfamiliar with how they are paid. i always wonder how much of the $40 i’m paying for that hair cut goes to them…it must be similar to the waitress thing since there is so much tipping in the beauty department.
    just my opinion! 🙂

  6. Coming from a country that is a carbon copy now of the US less ‘tipping’ and Hallowe’en (and the lunacy of your presidential nomination campaigns – Praise God – although there are attempts to import Hallowe’en) i have to say i just don’t get the whole tipping thing.

    Someone tried explaining it to me recently – fairly well i thought – but i still can’t figure out who deserves a tip and why? Some people who serve you do – some don’t?

    Sarah’s comment only highlights why i have a strong aversion to the whole concept. Being paid less than a Hundred dollars for a commitment to work a 40 hour week for someone plus call ins when and as required by the boss? Simply so the boss can pay less tax and push the tax on the tips to the worker???

    Ed’s point about the cost of the restaurant determining the size of the tip just adds to the inequity of a system little removed from slavery.

    Give people the dignity of a decent wage they can feed their family on without having to rely on ‘the kindness of strangers’.

    If you HAVE the money to tip and the service is exceptionally good – tip! who’s stopping you?

    But $2.13 an hour in a country with the wealth yours has??

    Not Good.


  7. Hey Tipping is not required.. Tipping is an offering.

    Waitresses do make nothing and they should be tipped generously if they deserve it.

    Case in point: When I go to lunch with a girlfriend, let’s say my mentor, I sit at a restaurant for awhile. I’m a serious coffee drinker and I always have a glass of milk with my food.. crazy.
    So when I order I always ask for my milk with my food. Hot milks sucks right? soo…

    1. waitress – doesn’t bring my milk at all but still charges me, coffee I have to ask for constantly.. 10%

    2. waitress- milk is brought out with all the other drinks and sits there until my food comes, refills my coffee sometimes without asking 15%

    3. Waitress- coffee is always filled until I’m floating, milk comes with my main meal – ice cold?? 30%

    It’s all in the service…

    Cathi for this blog post… your tip is priceless!!!

  8. I was a waitress/server for 6-7 years, earning $2.13 per hour, which I never saw, because it all went to pay my income taxes. Sometimes I would literally get checks for .13 cents….seriously.

    I was an exceptional server, even on bad days, but that is beside the point. lol

    My husband is a chef…..and even though we do not own our own restaurant, we do know that profit margin in decent restaurants is extremely low. If restaurant owners paid their servers more, they would not be able to afford to be in business, literally……..

    Most people go out to eat for good food, and to be served. We take for granted how valuable the service actually is – even just basic service. But most people also don’t realzie that the servers folded the napkins, wrapped the silverware, mopped the floors, washed the windows, cleaned the menus, filled the sugar caddies, made the coffee/tea, and in many restaurants, the servers even help prep the food (washing spinich, pulling stems off basil, etc). So often, the server did more than take your order and keep your drinks refilled…..and they did it all for nothing but the tips they might earn. I’ve always had a theory that if you can’t afford to tip, you shouldn’t go out to eat…..which is why we almost never go out to eat!

    As for the “pick up”….one server took responsibiltiy to see that your order was correct, packed the bag with all the extras, etc. They don’t deserve 15% for doing that job, but a couple bucks is good, depending on the cost. By the way…usually the bartender does this job, which takes them away from the bar and adds a little more fury to their job.

    Hair……this one drives me nuts. I don’t think they should get tipped if they do a good job….I think they should just do a good job and earn what they charge. But I tip anyway…because I’d feel guilty if I didn’t. I’ve heard it is ok to not tip your hair professional if he or she owns the salon….

    Sorry to be so longwinded today.

  9. I HATE tipping. I think it’s totally unnecessary the VAST majority of the time. I’ve written all about my highly opinionated view on tipping in a former post – “Why I Hate the Whole Concept of Tipping.”

  10. HEIDI! You are nicer than me. I wouldn’t tip AT ALL for #1. I’d only tip the 10% for #2 and for #3 I’d tip okay for. Not a lot though. It has to be GREAT service done with a SMILE and a good attitude.

    I worked in two coffee shops and got tips at both. My tips increased based on my friendliness and how well I made a drink, and how fast. Doing a mediocre job, or even “just” your job without going above and beyond doesn’t warrant a big tip.

    I am picky about WHO I tip, but when I tip, I tip well. Very well. You have to earn the tip. Doing your job right and well gets you a paycheck. You have to EARN the extra.

    I sound mean. 😆

  11. I’m more than impressed here with the genuine response of agreement and disagreement…i rarely engage in debate, but this thing is awesome…I’m ready to propose this topic to academic challenge!!!
    [i’d so write more and in response to each of you…but due to my weekend of bliss, i’m emotionally, physically and intellectually exhausted!!!]

  12. My wife and I have twin daughters who have both worked in restaurants as waitresses; one is currently working in that capacity.

    Because we have a close connection with our daughter and see how little she brings home, we tend to be good tippers. I would rather not tip, but waiters/waitresses just aren’t paid very well.

    When a person is pleasant and attentive, it certainly makes tipping easier. Those who are grumpy and don’t serve well still get a tip from us, and often it’s a good one, too.

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